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EXPIRED

By Faiza Ramunny

My name is Faiza, and I’m a 38-year-old unmarried Muslim woman who’s often labeled as “EXPIRED.” Hence my handle @expirednfabulous.

Why? Well, I’m over twenty-five and despite having been proposed to twice, I’ve never been married. It’s certainly not the norm for MusRabs, and it is not easily understood how a woman with a drop of Arab blood, even one that’s a “Half & Half” like me, could possibly be thirty-eight and without a ring on her finger and a couple of kids to her name.

Yet here I am. ELLO!

Navigating through life in this community, where this mentality thrives as an unmarried woman, has been one hell of a journey—not to mention lonely as heck at times. It is not easy being the only unmarried woman in the room, sometimes watching every girl from my generation married with kids while I’m sitting here watching anime with a box of Russel Stover chocolates. Facing family, culture, community, societal expectations, and questions about my choices has been a daily battle that, more often than not, results in endless questions and a truckload of gossip. Most people look at me like I’m this pitiful single who can’t find anyone to love her, but that couldn’t be further from the truth.

If I wanted just to be married, I would marry any one of the suitors around me. Not a narcissistic statement but a truth. I’m not without suitors; however, they’re not ‘The One,’ and I’m not willing to settle. I’m not willing to become what I’ve seen in my many years of working within the MusRab and many other like-minded communities—women who settled with a guy to be ‘Just Married,’ only to end up ‘Just Divorced.’ I would rather wait for ‘The One.’ A journey that, in itself, takes a tremendous amount of patience, courage, and faith.

When I decide to marry, it will be to ‘The One,’ and I’ll know when I’ve finally met him. Of course, there are many who don’t understand or believe this when it comes from the mouth of women who are labeled ‘expired,’ like me, but I don’t give two fucks. Personally, I can tell you that I’ll know when I’ve met ‘The One.’ A look. A feeling. A voice that whispers deep inside, ‘That’s him.’ I KNOW THIS! Working with clients looking for love for sixteen years now has proved this to me without a shadow of a doubt. And when I marry, it won’t be because of culture, family, community, or societal expectations, but for L.O.V.E!

I’ve always been a woman who will take EXPIRED over COMPLACENT any minute of the day. A path I pray others take instead of allowing fear, uncertainty, and insecurity to lead them down the aisle to Mr. Wrong.

You see, like the rest of my EXPIRED Queens out there, I’m not rushing, love, despite getting lonely. I’m not desperate for a man, regardless of my deep desire to have one in my life. I’m not evaporating over here without a man or shishkebabbing every guy around town to fill some void. I don’t need your pity or worry for my future or ovaries. I’m happily at HOME, focusing on myself, my grind, chasing my dreams, working towards buying my mom a home, and helping others heal as I do the same.

We’re patient, not desperate, with an inner knowing that we don’t NEED a man to make us whole or build moon-bound lassos. Instead, a woman must embrace the reachable stars on her own until she finds ‘The One’ to explore the constellations with, even if that finds her labeled, ‘EXPIRED.

39 thoughts on “EXPIRED”

  1. Lena says:

    I got your email. Yayyy!!! So excited. Three weeks was too long. Never again Mama. Btw I’m expired too and I can relate so much. PLZZ keep writing and talking about this subject. We need this now more than ever. Love you Mama

    Reply
  6. Yusra says:

    Faiza I’m crying over here. This blog connected with me so much. I’m struggling so much as an expired woman. I want to get at your level. It’s so hard and nobody’s talking about this. Please continue. Don’t stop. We need you so much our Expired Queen. I love you so much

    Reply
  9. T says:

    I’m a guy but this resonates with me too. Guys have deadlines in our culture too and I struggle a lot with that with my parents. I’m waiting on the right girl and they don’t get it lool

    Reply
  14. Isir says:

    I love this so much. I’m 45 and still single. I was married but it ended in divorce. I don’t have kids which makes it easier to date but it’s still so hard and nobody really understands. So thank you for this. Please keep writing about this journey. So many of us need you

    Reply
  16. Anonymous says:

    Relatable af mama. Can you explain what kind of man you’re looking for. I feel like I struggle with this.

    Reply
  19. Natalie says:

    29 and everyone thinks I’m expired. I hate it but I think I’m learning to love it. I want to learn to stop lying about my age. Help me 🤣

    Reply
  20. Jomana says:

    I love how you value yourself. The way you’re not willing to just date around. I love this level of woman. I need you in my life now more than ever Faiza. Keep writing. I added my email 🥰🥰🥰

    Reply
  21. Anonymous says:

    Ma sha allah, you write so beautifully. I could read your work for hours and never get tired! Keep up the hard work <3

    Reply
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