What would you say to Muslim girls who want to wear the headscarf but are afraid to? I am a Muslim girl who loves the concept of hijab, but whenever I wear it in public I feel like everybody’s eyes are on me and they’re all secretly judging me. Because of this and the fact that most of my female family members don’t wear the headscarf, I feel out of place and don’t enjoy the experience of wearing hijab. I also want to disappear sometimes because of that feeling that I’m being watched.
I love the hijab and want to wear it when I see other Muslim women doing so, but I don’t enjoy the experience when I put it on and feel like I’m being judged. What do I do??
Dear Potential Hijabi,
As you have seen from my page, I obviously don’t wear hijab, but I use to. I started wearing the hijab when I was eight years old, until I was nineteen. It wasn’t something I had chosen to do, but rather something that was mandatory since I grew up in a strict home, and attended a strict Islamic school. When I educated myself on hijab and realized that the most important factor behind wearing it was in fact choice, I realized that I didn’t have one considering that it was required and no other option was ever offered to me. So I took it off and promised myself that I would make that decision when the proper intentions came to me.
I tell you this because it seems you are already one step ahead since you’ve emotionally made the choice to wear hijab which is AMAZING. It’s truly beautiful that the intention is there in your heart. When it comes down to it, your intention isn’t driven by other people and their opinions, it’s driven by your love for Allah (SWT).
The Hard Truth is this, whether you do something positive or negative, people are going to cast some sort of judgement towards you. We are all going to be judged by someone whether it’s family, friends, our community, culture, society, hell everywhere you go there’s someone waiting to judge you about something. We can’t control that! What we CAN control, is how we react to it.
I have learned through a lot of bad experiences that we can’t focus on what other people think. You have to focus on what YOU think and what you believe to be the right thing for your life.
Your decision to wear hijab shouldn’t be based on other peoples opinions, or your family who doesn’t wear it, they have no bearing on this decision. It’s your life, it’s how you are choosing to express your faith. When the last day comes it won’t be these opinionated people that stand as witness for you, it’ll be your very own actions and intentions. So really, how much does what they say matter?
Hope this helps and I want a SnapChat of your beautiful self wearing that beautiful hijab. You can do this! Have faith!